Coco Pops Monkey Eulogy

We stand here today to offer our respects to Geoff, a great monkey and a wonderful friend. I remember when I first met him in the early 90’s, when he first got the role as the Coco Pops monkey; he was raw but talented. First day of shooting he turned up to work with a spoon and everyone knew there and then we had a star in the making, what a character. This personality captivated tens of millions of people around the world and he became a star over night. He was even responsible for the catchphrase "Coco Pops and milk make a bowlful of fun". Oh how he loved those chocolate rice crispies.

Over the years though it’s fair to say he started to resent his success as he inevitably became typecast as the coco pops monkey. What people don’t know is that he had a wonderful acting range and always talked of walking the hallowed boards of the theatre. As we all know this dream never became a reality, producers simply wouldn’t take that chance, all except Big Brother. He despised that show, but he thought it was his last chance to reinvent himself and become more than, in his words, a ‘cheeky monkey’. Unfortunately during a drink-fuelled night he made some racist comments and was kicked out of the house. In interviews following the dismissal he claimed producers somehow spiked his drink. From that point on the decline was rapid.

He quickly fell into the wrong crowd, associating with Snap, Crackle and Pop of Rice Crispies fame. Before long Geoff was drinking all hours, and experimenting with drugs, that’s when he first tried crack. He was never satiated, and would always chase the high by repeating the dose or dull the cravings with heroine. There was no talking to him, he was constantly spouting crack gibberish and became extremely paranoid. He was a different monkey and not the friend I once knew.

On Wednesday 1st October I found him dead on his toilet after suffering a heart attack. It was no doubt caused by the crack and the heroine but I thought it was poignant that a bowl of coco pops was sitting on his lap at the time.

I dredge up his past misdemeanours only to shed light on a complicated monkey, and fundamentally a good monkey who sadly let his unfulfilled ambition destroy him. I’ll remember him not hunched over the toilet seat, no, but us hiking together. He was a keen hiker and his knowledge of the countryside was exemplary.

Geoff, God bless. I’ll miss you.